Ilicet
by Yokata Mizu Yosei
Summary: Rogue is walking away. Character study.


Author: Yukata Mizu  
Title: Walk Away  
Summary: For andthexmen's Off-Season Fic Off #1. Rogue is walking away.  
Ratings: PG. Ish.  
Pairings: None intentionally. Might see a touch of Rogan if you squint and tilt your head a bit, or a second of one-sided Logan/Jean, but nothing any more explicit than is seen in canon.  
Warnings: Uh, there shouldn't be anything. A little language, some flangst 'cuz we're dealing with Rogue, that's really about it. Only spoilers, technically, for the first three episodes. Given the episode discussions, I highly doubt that's going to spoil anyone. Oh, and I kind-of drew on the latest Rogue miniseries for her back-story.  
Disclaimer: Don't own 'em, don't particularly want to own 'em, and have absolutely no claim on 'em in any other way. I'm just here to play in the sandbox.

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Ilicet

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She's walking away, now.

She's walking away and, somehow, it's simultaneously the most heartbreaking yet most liberating decision she's ever made. And she **means** that.

She **could** turn around, could try to fix all the damage she's just wrought, could do a **lot** of things, but she **won't**. Not this time.

She's **tired** of being left behind. It always happens and she hates it. Before, she'd just accepted it as a matter of fact. She'd be left behind, that's just the way it was. But she never wanted that for herself, so she decided to change it.

She'd honestly thought things would be different when she joined the X-Men. They promised her so much, so many precious, precious things, but they lied and she doesn't think she can forgive that. They lied and it hurt when she figured it out, when she was left standing there uselessly while everyone drifted away, drifted apart. She'd thought . . . Well, she'd thought a lot of things. It didn't make any of them true.

It hurt to be forgotten, to be ignored, and she'd felt invisible as they all went back to the lives they had before. She didn't have that, didn't have a life to go back to, didn't have any_**one**_ to go back to, but she couldn't stay there. She couldn't stay, so she packed her things and she left just like everyone else.

Everyone always leaves her. It's something she's accustomed to, no matter how much she hates it. First her parents disappeared when she was a child, and then her friends rejected her when her mutation manifested and left her poor best friend in a coma, and finally Logan left.

Logan. That, more than anything else in the world, nearly destroyed her. She'd been young enough when her parents vanished that she hadn't really understood what it meant. With her friends . . . Well, that had hurt, certainly. It really did. But she hadn't respected her friends, hadn't looked up to them, not like she did Logan. So, in the end, that hadn't hurt anywhere near as much. Logan . . . He became a father-figure to her, looking out for her like no one ever had before.

Once, she'd fancied herself in love with him. It was a mistake, of course. But, even if she **had **been, it wouldn't have mattered, would it? Because all he'd ever seen was Ms. Grey and, really, she'd never hold a candle to that kind of flame. And it wouldn't have done her any good, **anyway**, because being in love wouldn't have made a difference when he kept leaving and she was left watching his back as he walked away from her.

And maybe that's why she's doing this. Maybe she was just so sick and tired of watching everybody leave her that she cracked a little. Maybe she's doing this because she just feels so hurt all she can do is lash out. Maybe she's just so fucking sick of all this that it's just another form of retaliation.

Walking away, now, she knows this won't destroy the X-Men but it won't help them, and she's okay with that. They left her to hang, she doesn't give a **damn** if they're sorry, they **left **her and she doesn't forgive so easily. Not anymore. She has a new family and this one, she hopes, won't betray her.

She's made her decision. If everyone is going to leave her anyway . . .

She's going to walk away first.

So she does. She walks away, and as she does, a small smile plays on her lips.

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Translation:  
ilicet: Latin: it is finished, right away, immediately


End file.
